HOLD ONTO YOUR DREAM
--By Sondra F. McCauley

If you know me, you may be aware that I am currently working on recording a compact disk of Christian songs that I have written. This is a major undertaking for me, and a long awaited one. I love music-and I love worshipping God through music. I've been a praise and worship leader in my church for about a decade, but few people know about the new songs that God has given me during my private times with Him. I've been songwriting since about 1993-not Gospel tunes, although they do convey the message of the Gospel. Rather, they are inspirational ballads birthed out of my relationship with the Lord--the things that I have walked through and the insights He has given me. In total, I have compiled over 30 songs-some complete and copyrighted, some virtually finished but still subject to change, some merely lyrics, some just melodies with few words, and others just ideas that God has sparked within me.

Not too long after God first inspired me to write songs, I became excited and started looking for avenues for furthering my music. I sought pianists to help me put the songs to music. I took courses in singing and piano. I also attended a few praise and worship workshops on songwriting and copyrighting original music. But all to no avail…at the time. I know with hindsight that it simply was not the season for the gift to come forth. Though I've shared a bit of my original music with close friends and relatives, only once over the past decade has God released me to present any of my songs during congregational praise and worship. Frustrated at the locked doors and blocked paths, I gave up. Though God continued to inspire me to write from time to time, I generally left my notebook of writings in a drawer and told God that they would stay there until He wanted them to come out. During that season, God virtually killed any drive on my part to make something happen with the songs. It has taken the prompting of Pastors, friends, and total strangers for me to get the message that, after 8 years of waiting, the time has arrived. But that's okay. I've come to learn that the songs are His, not mine. Now God can work the songs the way He wants, not me.

So, I currently spend Friday evenings in a recording studio-and a great one at that! David and Sherrie Scott at Melodies Christian Recording (www.melodiesrecording.com) have been fantastic and uplifting to work with. My times of creating and recording have been more like fellowship with them and God rather than work. And hearing the songs come to fruition is like a dream come true. What I've found, however, is that some of the folks that I most expected to be supportive, won't share or encourage me in fulfilling this dream. The skeptical looks and critical comments I've received from friends, family, and co-workers alike have been dismaying. There are others that go to pains to offer no comment at all. And the questions! "Why are you spending your time on that? Why are you wasting your money on that? How do you expect to market the CDs? How do you know the songs will sell? How do you know if you are good enough? How do you know if you'll get your money back?" And so forth.

People around you can be dream-killers, if you let them. I've learned that stepping out in faith for something beyond the common and the ordinary that most men would expect is likely to arouse criticism, jealousy, and discouragement. It's akin to Nehemiah and the children of Israel rebuilding the walls of Jerusalem while being mocked and attacked by Tobiah and Sanballat. (Nehemiah 4-6) One friend aptly called it "crabology"--the phenomenon of one crab seeking to climb out of captivity in a barrel while all of the other crabs grab hold to pull the daring soul back in.

Just like taking faith for anything else, I've learned to be quiet and not share so much with folks anymore. In general, we all have to be careful whom we let speak into our lives: the naysayers are out there-saved and unsaved-and negative words can kill. When such words come now, I respond that I'm taking a step forward using God's music, God's money, God's talent, and God's faith. As in the parable of the talents, I would be a poor steward to do any less. (Matt. 25:14-30) Where this is all headed, I can't yet see. I'm sowing a seed, but the harvest is up to Him. Yes, I will use prudence and wisdom in the expense and the time spent, but I will also do my part in terms of the labor and the nurturing necessary for the product to come forth. And I will bring every available strategy to bear to market the finished work. But the outcome and fruit of it all rests with God. He's the one who gave the dream and the idea of what is possible in the first place.

God gives dreams to all of us. Joseph was a dreamer and though He had to go through 13 years of slavery and persecution, he came out second only to the Pharaoh and as the "salvation" of Israel. What men had meant for evil, God meant for good. (Genesis 50:20) David was a dreamer, too. Though he spent many years on the run from Saul after being anointed as his replacement, this shepherd boy ultimately became king of Israel. I'm sure you have dreams, too. What seemingly impossible aspiration have you hidden in your heart and despaired that it would ever come to pass? Hold onto your dream and wait on the Lord. Then, when He says "go," step out and watch Him move in ways you probably never dreamed.